Scroll on by…

Social Media Scroll
Just Scroll On By…

There’s an awful lot of stuff on social media about how you have to TAKE A STAND, but the more I scroll through the comments and replies on just about any current issue whether it be *Melinda and Bill’s divorce or whether Chrissy Teigen IS SORRY ENOUGH for those ugly DMs she sent to someone else famous (whose name I can’t recall because I am old and uncool) the more I think that instead of taking a stand one should rather STFU.

MUST remember
MUST remember

Especially if you know nothing or next to nothing about the topic you’re now TAKING A STAND ABOUT. I wonder if perhaps we should focus more on how we treat people in everyday life, especially people subordinate to us, instead of being social media warriors.

Let’s be honest, it’s much easier to take a stand on social media where we are followed mostly by like-minded people and can block anyone that says something we disagree with, than it is to TAKE ACTION and remember those damn coffee cups and stop using disposable coffee cups (It’s me. I keep forgetting my reusable coffee cups. I am killing the environment, one coffee cup at a time).

I know what happens, we see an issue blowing up on social media, we feel vaguely guilty (perhaps because like me we do not have an in-depth knowledge of whatever crisis is being mentioned) and think I HAVE TO TAKE A STAND.

We then post or tweet something and before we know it, we’ve got embroiled in some argument where we’re now calling people stupid and saying that their parents are a perfect example of why people should use contraceptives or even perhaps that their parents were clearly close relatives and they have a sub 100 point IQ. We’re saying stuff that we would NEVER say to someone standing right in front of us.

Scroll Meme

And I have to ask the question, “Is this really making the world a better place?”


Having read the book she co-authored Selfies, Sexts and Smartphones, AND interviewed her AND attended a seminar of hers, I love what Emma Sadleir has to say on the subject. Basically, DO NOT tweet or post or tiktok anything you wouldn’t say to a person’s face. That includes those irritating passive aggressive posts and memes people put on their feeds. Either tell us exactly what you mean when you say that you will never forgive your mother/ex-husband/boss/lover/employee, or don’t post it. Don’t tease us with your lack of details.

I’m kidding. Don’t tell us ANYTHING about your mother/ex-husband/boss/lover/employee. That shit is for your therapist/wine session with your bestie, it’s not for social media.

The point is and I cannot emphasise this enough: we don’t HAVE to comment on everything. We don’t HAVE to take a stand. Unless the issue is of BURNING importance to us, and we know what we’re talking about and we really think that our tweet or post is going to make a difference.

Otherwise, we should just scroll on by and leave the analysis to people who are actually employed to do that shit and know lots of long words to prove it. Otherwise, all we are doing is messing with our own mental health and contributing to the cesspool that is social media…the ugliness where people feel completely entitled to say whatever the hell they like because there’s no one to punch them in the face and tell them to stop.

Tall Bones

As this is supposed to be a book blog, let me give you a bookish example: there are readers amongst us who like to post about how much they hated a certain book and THEY TAG THE AUTHOR in the post. Then when you confront them about it, they tell you they are just being honest. No. You are just being an asshole.

Hate the book/film/play whatever, feel free to give it a shitty review but DO NOT tag the person who created it in your shitty review. They really, really don’t need to know how much you hated their book/film/play because it’s done and there’s literally nothing they can do about it.

Black Widows

Book recommendations: Tall Bones by Anna Bailey. A literary whodunnit about a girl who goes missing in small-town America. I absolutely gobbled it up. It is heartwrenching and evocative and gorgeously written. A must-read.

Midlife Money Makeover

I then moved on to Black Widows by Cate Quinn about three sister-wives and their murdered husband. Recommended by the divine Marian Keyes, I’m finding it rather riveting.

And because I am a COMPLETE BOOK SLUT, I have also started reading Kim Potgieter’s Midlife Money Makeover. God knows I need one. Thank you, Lyndsay Barr for my gorgeous, signed copy. Will report back when I have finished it.

TV recommendation: The Estate. On from Monday to Friday at 7pm on S3. The Husband just discovered that ZenzelisphesihleSparky” Xulu who plays Siya in the show is a Maritzburg College Old Boy and he is BEYOND proud.

Sparky Xulu
Sparky Xulu

Finally, be kind to yourselves. I realized after I had more than one meltdown this week that I am actually a tad stressed. Not really surprising when I consider my workload or the fact that we are living through a pandemic. So now, I do this thing where I speak to myself nicely every morning. The conversation goes something like:

“Look at you, that extra weight suits you, gal. Why suck the fat out of dead people and inject it into your face when you can just use your VERY OWN fat to plump up those wrinkles? You are fantastically voluptuous and sexy and the way you didn’t take your make-up off last night and you just pushed the dregs of your mascara up underneath your eyes looks just like eyeliner. So clever and economical!”

No, I don’t really say things like that. I say KIND things to myself and I promise you it works. Try it! Have a great week and happy reading xxx

*I read that Melinda started meeting with divorce lawyers back in 2019 because of Bill’s association with the odious Jeffrey Epstein. I had to rush downstairs to discuss this with my husband one evening.

Husband: is this the something really, REALLY important you had to tell me?

I regret to say, dear reader, that it was.